Hello, I'm Elder Gandy, Super Missionary.
That's right, you heard me, Super Missionary.
Why? Cuz I did it, I got my very own baptism yesterday, or dunk, as we missies say. It was a beautiful thing, lemme tell you about it.
Meeting Jolie
Jolie is the very young daughter of Rachel and Mark. Both of whom were really nice, but obviously not prepared for the Lord's true calling, a member of the church.
But they were nice enough to let me teach Jolie, the smartest 8 year old I have ever met. She was a tough sell, as we missionaries say, but well worth it.
The Super Spiritual Experience
My comp and I were visiting Rachel and Mark this past weekend, and while we were there, I bore my testimony super, super hard. It was so hard in fact, that almost everyone was crying, or zoning out, sometimes I can't see so good.
As I was bearing my testimony with a special sauce, I could feel the spirit working inside me, so I just let go and let the spirit talk through me, right to Jolie. In my usual spiritual fashion, I let my eyes roll back into the top of my head, and lifted half of my body off of the ground and put my chest into the air. My arms started to rise up and float next to my body, and I let go.
I let the spirit speak this time. It was truly a gift from God. My voice started to shrill and get higher and higher, and my comp was flicking the lights on and off while I started speaking in my shrill voice:
JOLIEEEEE!!! THOU SHALT BE BAPTIZED INTO MY CHUUUURRRCHH!! THE ONLY TRUEE CHURCH OF GODDDDD!! DO IT OR BE DAMNED BY THE ANGEL WITH THE SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD!!
the spirit was so strong.
Just then, my comp turned the lights off and made a dash to Jolie, where he stood above her and used a flashlight to shine light on his face. He said he was the destroying angel, and if she didn't get baptized, he would take the sword of angel vengeance and visit upon her and her family.
The spirit was really, really strong.
After that, I turned on the lights and saw tears pouring down from Jolies face. She looked at me in my eyes and said, "I'll do it. I'll get baptized."
I knew right then that god answers prayers. Not always on our time table, and maybe not ever in this life, but they are answered. Hard.
Pray for me
- Elder Gandy: Super Missionary
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'She looked at me in my eyes and said, "I'll do it. I'll get baptized."'
ReplyDeleteThat right there is the sweet smell of spiritual victory for the Lord.
You Elders are doing a heaven of a job. We're praying for you in Colorado.
- Tom.
Thanks, brother Tom!!
ReplyDeleteWe need all the help we can get, even people kneeling down in their houses while air leaves their lungs helps. Pray for us.
Spiritual victories are the best. I've started putting stickers on my missionary bag for all the dunks I've done.
So far I only have one, but that's going to change because I've decided to fast every day this week.
Pray for me
- Elder Gandy
Elder Gandy, bearing your testimony can be spiritually draining, can't it? What do you do to recharge the "spiritual batteries" (as WE used to say in MY mission) (I went on a mission too) :) Anyway, that is my question for you. Evan
ReplyDeleteAnonymous - can I call you Anon?
ReplyDeleteYou see, Anon, bearing my testimony takes out all my spiritual juices. What do I do to recharge? Simple. I do scripture golf.
What is scripture golf? I'm not exactly sure. It's a game some of the Elders made up in my district, but I never win. They always win, they're sooo good at it.
That recharges my batteries because it shows me how utterly worthless and humble I am. And knowing that I'm humble gives me POWER!!
Spiritual power, not real power.
So when I bear my testimony, I can really, really, get into it, because I know I'm right - Jesus is real, so, so, so real.
And he probably watches blues clues with his kids, just like my Uncle Ernie.
Pray for me,
Elder Gandy
Elder,
ReplyDeleteFirst of all. NO! I don’t mind you calling me Anon. But remember that I have more church experience than you (I was just released as our ward accountant) but it doesn’t matter because the bishop was immediately inspired to make me young women’s president, which I absolutely love. The spirit is real and, as we both know, works in mysterious ways.
So I will learn and I will grow, much like you in your mission. (where are you, anyways elder?)
But like I was saying, I would rather you address me as brother or something. Just so we know where were at.
I’m not sure I ever played scripture golf when I was a missionary (I was a AP, by the way). But just a piece of advise… even when your companions are actively engaging in an activity that will take the spirit from you (vitally important to your job as you know!) DOES NOT MEAN that you have to participate. AND WHAT’S WORSE, you can actually do more harm than good EVEN WITH a seemingly harmless game.
BELIEVE ME! I should know.
One year during Christmas me and my comp had a girl named whitney all ready to be baptized. All the discussions and had commited to baptism, on Christmas day too! Awesome. Well anyway that morning we get out of bed and, blasting in the other room, the two other elders were living with are playing the Mariah carey Christmas album. I knew that it wasn’t on the pre-approved listening list that I got THE DAY I GOT TO SPAIN, but the other elders in my apartment told me to lighten up and it wasn’t such a big deal.
Long story short, whitney was in a car accident that morning. She’s now a quadrepelegic. What’s worse, she never got baptized. She will NEVER have the spirit in her life.
Thanks Mariah.
Just thought I’d share that with you. Hope it helps.
I know, I know, I know what you mean, Brother Anonymous. Keeping the rules is so crazyily, insanely important. I know this is true so hard.
ReplyDeleteFor instance, my brother was serving his mission around ten years ago. He was a faithful missionary, but his companion was not at all. His comp would go and do all sorts of things that were against the rules, like drink regular coke instead of caffeine free diet coke, or sometimes he would listen to Enya instead of listening to previous church talks.
I know, he was a very irreverent missionary, probably one of the worst.
Long story short, he and his comp were late getting home. They had been doing some street contacting and took the bus home, but they were running late. My brother wanted to run home so he could make it back to the house before 9:30, but his comp was too fat, and thus could not run.
They did not make it home by 9:30 - they were 3 minutes late.
What happened next? The very next day, the twin towers fell to the earth. They were destroyed, simply because my brother and his comp did not get to their house on time.
You see!! You see the insanity!!! If they would have just ran home instead of waddling home, they could have saved over 3,000 lives!!
Now all those people are dead simply because they did not obey the mission rules.
Disobedience is a horrible disease.