What the Luke and Leia kiss teaches about eternal marriage

This is from a talk I gave last week in sacrament meeting: 

One of the most profound memories of my youth was watching Luke and Leia kiss on the big screen. It was magical, and I didn't realize it then, but there are some incredible gospel truths in that kiss.

For you see, Luke and Leia skywalker learned that they were actually brother and sister, which is a type and shadow for us of higher, more noble truthiness.

We are all brothers and sisters, children of our Heavenly Parents. This is an undeniable gospel truth. And it brings me great comfort to know that even though my earthly father beat me something unmercifull as a child for "being an idiot" I know my real Father in Heaven would never treat me like you did, Dad!

Anyway, when we men merry their spouse, they're actually marring thier sister. And we all know what happens when you get married, you're no longer VL, or virgin lips, to the Gentiles. Like Luke and Leia showed us, it is perfectly fine and acceptable to kiss our sisters.

Brothers marrying sisters is a holy order because we are all sons and daughters of god. This is why when you go to church on Sunday you call them brother Johnson, or sister gandy, so on and so forths. We are all related. Kin is kin. 

I'm so glad to have a father in heaven who loves me and has provided so many wonderful righteous sisters for me to marry when I get home from my mission. 

Amen.

Brothers and Sisters

I gave a talk today in sacrament meeting. It was good. It was about my first month as an LDS missionary. Here's a summary:

Good afternoon brothers and sisters. I never thought I'd make it here today. But, here I am. I am here today to tell you about something super sweet and special. Jesus. You see, brothers and sisters, Jesus is the 'key' to the gospel.

Usually, when I teach people in their homes, they don't really know who Jesus is, so I tell them. Jesus is the 'key', and then I show them my keys to the car I drive. The key unlocks the doors to the car, and then, when you insert the key, you can then turn on the car.

Like the key, Jesus can turn on our engines. He can even rev up our engines, if you will.

(Right in the middle of the talk, I felt prompted by the spirit to change what I was saying midsentence)

Brothers and Sisters, I feel a special feeling that the spirit wants me to say something, something really, really important to someone out there that's listening. I can feel the spirit work through me know...coming up...up to my throat...coming up now....here it is.......

"Do not seek the treasure. Do not seek the treasure. The Eagle is on the Table. The Eagle is on the Table. THE BISHOP'S DAUGHTER IS NOT WEARING ANY PANTIES."

After saying that, I was so overcome by the spirit that I fainted backwards, hitting my head on the wooden chairs right behind me. I started crying and wailing.

It hurt bad, but the spirit had to say what he had to say. I had a big bump on my head the rest of the day (and I kinda threw up all over the bishop because I was so dizzy after hitting my head, but it's ok because he said he could get his clothes dry cleaned).

The spirit is awesome.

Pray for me,

- Elder Gandy