Mormon stories and Tom Sawyer

I know, I know. You're sitting there thinking to yourself, what the heck is Elder Gandy writing about this time?

I'll tell you what he's writing about; he's writing about the greatest lesson ever told. He's writing about how to influence people and get them to be your friends. He's writing about missionary work.

You see, whenever I'm in teaching mode at a stranger's house, I tell them the most profound spiritual lesson I can. And it goes something like this:

Many, many years ago, before the invention of the motor car, there was a man, a great man with silver lined golden hair, blue eyes that burned like the underbelly of the bright sun, and teeth that were straight as fence posts. That man, no, that incredible man's name was Joseph Smith.

Now let me tell you something, sir (talking to the stranger as I sit on his chair in his house) That man created the greatest religion of all time. And he got people to work, days and days and days, on his church for free. Not just for free, but he got them to pay 10% (and if their really, really righteous, 20%) of all their income to his church. How did, I said how did he do that?

Easy. Joseph Smith was the modern day Tom Sawyer.

You see, Joseph and Tom are very, very similar. Tom Sawyer had to paint a fence. But he didn't want to. It was hard, and the fence smelled. So he had an idea; he would get others to paint the fence for him, and he would not only get them to do the work, he would have them pay to do it. That's right, the workers paid Tom to paint his fence.

How did he do it? Easy. He did it through the spirit.

The spirit knows all. And it knows a good deal when it sees it. Good deals are true, and they are delicious to the taste. So when Joseph Smith had to build his church, he convinced all these people to build it for him, but not only to build it with their own time and resources, but to pay Joseph 10% of all their income, too.

Genius.

That's why Joseph Smith and Tom Sawyer are the greatest minds that have existed in the Western Hemisphere since Sir Albert Einstein. I myself am doing the Prophet Smith proud. I not only work everyday knocking on doors trying to build his church, but I also pay for my expenses out of my own pocket. And on top of that, I make sure to pay 10% of all the money my parents send me to survive to Joseph's Church.